just when you think you can not be forgiven...

we as humans always tend to think of God as one of us, we think that he feels and thinks the way we do. that's incorrect, God is 100% good, and 100% love and righteousness. people are fallen, and flawed at best. there are so many things i can not forgive myself for but i have faith that God has. i can have this faith because unlike people, God loves with out condition. the bible says that while we where yet sinners Christ died for us, you see we had not done anything to deserve to be loved yet he did the most loving act in the history of time. he sacrificed his son for people who hate him. he loved us when we where yet in our sin and rebels against God. we also must not try to reason from our point of view up, but we must try to reason from God down to us. you see, we can not forgive things that God has no trouble forgiving because God loves in ways we can not yet comprehend. when he gave his son on the cross he knew that there was not a single sin that this love could not wash away, no matter what it is, our death giving sin is not so much as even worthy to be compared to to the life giving blood of Jesus Christ. let's think on this next time we can not forgive, ourselves or others.

sadness becomes joy

... and ye shall be sorrowful, but your sorrow shall be turned into joy.

yesterday would have been my best friends 29th birthday had he not committed suicide three years ago. it was a very sorrow filled day. after work i went out to meet his family at the grave site, again much sorrow. but the LORD started to turn things around for me there, the family came to me and asked if i would lead all of them in prayer. it was hard to do but i was happy to do it, also i felt some joy in that the family came to me to draw close to God in this time. the pain and sorrow of the day started to melt. after we went back to his mothers house. we talked about old times and new. through out the conversations i came to find out that his mother, grandmother, aunt, sister and brother in law have all come to know the lord as saviour. they are all in a local congregation and all very excited about their new found faith. the LORD took my sorrow and made it joy!! a thing only he can do.

i miss you john paul, rest in peace brother!

my thoughts on the promised land

anyone who was at f.b.b.c. for the mid week service will remember how pastor used the crossing over Jordan and entering into the promised land as a kind of picture of where the church is now and so on. i heard a different message altogether.

as the children of Israel leave Egypt and enter into the wilderness we see a kind of salvation there, but they have not completed the journey by far. 40 years spent wondering and wondering trying to get it right. i see in this the christian who has come to faith but is also wondering trying to get it right. so then after many years they arrive at the promised land, they cross over and it's easy street from there....right? NO, there is war waiting for them in that land. the difference is that now they have God to help them fight the battles. pastor said here, now that we are here don't just sit down and do nothing. it's time to go to war! time to win the battles. but i just thought of the christian who thinks that when he does find vital reality with God and he finally stops his wilderness wanderings, he thinks, oh man now i can relax, now its easy street. oh no my friends, the bible shows us when we become closer to God when the christian does find his way out of the world and into the light, the battles get heaver and they hit harder. we enter into his rest because now he is there to fight for us, not with us! but for us! for the battles are such as you and i on our own can never win.

how we battle sin

a must see! and please don't let the music and dancing throw you. it's the message that makes me keep watching it. (and i happen to like the song to but we won't go there).

Godtube

oh and this 2

Who is this man?

Who is this man that kicks us when we are down? Where does he come from, and how does he know we have just fallen. Unless? Is he also the man who tripped us up in the first place? That way he can watch as we stumble and time it out just right. How can he time it out with such perfection? Who is this man that will not seem to ever let up? Day after day kicking and kicking. Does he ever tire of all this toil? Does his foot ever hurt after such long bouts of thrashing and stomping? Who is this man that knows the right way to kick? Where did he learn this talent of such precisely placed pummeling’s? Maybe it’s instinctive. Who is this man who kicks us when we are down? Will he win? Or will the man who picks us back up again win? And who is this man who picks us back up again? Where does the man come from? Is he always there waiting for the dust to settle so he can reach down and scoop us up? Who is this man who knows when you are hurt, who knows when you have taken your final blow? This man who thinks not of himself, but of the well being of battered souls. Does he get tired of reaching down and lifting us up? Or does he tire of hearing the one he lifts complain and curse concerning the beating he just took? What of his feelings? Does he not desire well wishing for good deeds done? Will he ever get them? Who is this man and who is the other, one in the same or one in another?

down for the count!

i have not updated my blog, not out of laziness like normal. i just got home from park ridge hospital. i was admitted there Monday morning. last Friday as i was leaving work my ears where just a bit tender and achy. by the next morning i knew i was getting at least one ear infection and maybe two, off to the dr. i go. he tells me "you have two outer ear infections" oh boy super just in time for the holiday weekend right! by that night i knew i was in for it, both ears where draining and this nasty yellow stuff was running down both sides of my neck. it was sic! but as sic as it was it was better then when i woke up in the middle of the night both ears 100% plugged nothing coming out anymore and pressure you would not believe. by Sunday a.m. i was a mess, the left side of my face was all puffed up, my ear looked like i had been a wrestler my whole life (cauliflower ear i think they call it) well it looked like one any way. the pain was unreal, i have had these in the past and they are always bad but this was not like anything i ever had before. there was no way to stop it for any amount of time. but other then the pain the deafness has been the worst part, i knew something was wrong when i went to take a shower and i could not hear it at all. it's a strange thing you feel very weak, almost helpless with out your hearing. i got scared cuz i thought i was going deaf forever, but i stayed home one more night of utter agony. Monday i was going to the hospital. at this point i had been taking all the meds my doc gave me sense Saturday a.m. and it has gotten worse and worse like i never took a thing. off to the e.r. i stumble, driving around like a drunk im shocked i did not get a dwi on the way. but i made it, they get me in not to long, and get a cat scan to see whats going on. the infection had gone from the outer ear (where it was on Saturday) to the inner and the boney part with the fancy name, and out of the ear to the area around it, down into the jaw and was threating to enter into my bones. the guy came back and goes hey dave don't plan on going anywhere for some time. i thinking oh boy, what does that mean? are they going to start operating on me or what? so anyway, no cutting. just a whole lot of bags of antibiotics and tubes to open the ear canals to get drops in and all that fun stuff, and three days later im home and as deaf as can be. yup still deaf, still wanting to hear anything other then the ocean and my own heart beat. not fun things when your trying to sleep by the way. but, im ok. funny thing how i was so out of it but my dad came up from p.a. to see me and i swear from the second he walked into my room and woke me up i snapped out of it and have been getting better ever sense. strange how Gods timing is.

Desiring God

so, I'm reading the first book from the shipment of books i got from John Pipers ministry www.desiringGod.com they had a $5 all book sale and lets just say i took advantage. well so i thought i should start at the start, reading Desiring God. i am and it's has been such a blessing in just the first 50 pages. Piper starts out with how he became a Christian Hedonist, then goes right into what that means. it's really just a shocking way of saying God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him. what has really stood out to me is not that so much; but that glorifying God is what it's "all" about. Piper says "the chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying him forever" a play on the words of the original, and "the chief end of God is to glorify God and enjoy himself forever". that grabbed me, is God really so stuck on himself? again a piper quote "nothing pleases God more then God", and "he delights in his glory above all things". well i must say the first thought i had was "i object!" but i read on, he said he received much help from Jonathan Edwards in his book, the end for which God created the world. any one with a major objection to this thought is directed there. he goes on, "God's own glory is uppermost in his own affections, in everything he does his purpose is to preserve and display that glory." he poses the question i had thought of, "can he still be loving if this is true?" how can a loving God be so enamored with self? 1 cor 13:5?? in my own words, yes God not only can be loving and have his own glory be the uppermost in his affections, but furthermore that's the most loving thing he can do. all through out the bible God commands we praise him, again is this just some cheap way of getting glory from man? no! because God is the most wonderful, glorious, most good in all of creation and beyond; he has to first, love himself and have his own glory uppermost in his own affections, and second demand the same from us because to love that which is ultimately loving is the most loving thing. to demand we praise that which is ultimately praiseworthy is the most loving thing. for us and for God we must have God and his glory be the uppermost of our affections, anything less is idolatry. God can not love anything less then himself the most, and to command the same from us is the most loving thing he can do for us...or something like that, it's pretty deep and I'm just starting to scratch the surface. if it is true that Gods glory comes first and is why he does all things, it makes a huge difference in the way we view the things God has done through out history.